Fearless Women

Isn't that the best subject line ever?!

This post is twofold: One to announce our new art studio and business-- Teahouse Studio!!!

{deliriously happy here}

Stefanie, Tiffany and I officially signed the lease and popped open a bottle of champagne to our new endeavor that has been in our dreams for a long time! We are over the moon excited to build a community for artists, women and tea + champagne drinkers alike. hee.

Here's a link to our beautiful new studio space-- there's a bakery, yoga and lush green grass for picnicking. I can't believe my new studiomates made a website, facebook page and twitter site all in an afternoon!

The second part of this post, is to spread the word about this amazing organization and dreaming big retreat NEXT weekend! Tiffany emailed me earlier this week to let me know about an upcoming retreat put on by the Fearless Women Network (I so wanna join!) that is all about creating space and energy behind your dreams.

As an artist and small business owner, people often say to me, "You're so lucky! I wish I could work for myself and live my dream!" To which I say, you can!

But it's hard. It's hard to take that first step. So many people out there, women especially, don't always allow themselves the space and the courage to find out what they really want to do.

Having a plan is the first step in finding your way.

And that's where this Ideation Retreat comes in. You get to join 15 women on a 2-day discovery session in the beautiful Marin Headlands that includes full creative freedom, yoga, hiking, laughing, talking and a really safe space to let your dreams emerge.

Can I say that again: a really safe space to let your dreams emerge.

The retreat is being held January 29-30 and you can go here for more information and here to register. Be sure to enter the code ReadyToCreate (because you are after all!) to get 25% off the registration fee!! It's a super deal already, but getting the whole two days (meals & lodging included) for only $318 is really a steal. It's a steal and investment. In your future.

Are you ready to make that leap ladies?

xoxox
Mati

Dream Lab with Mondo Beyondo & Brene Brown

I'm writing this quickly all fuzzy with an ear ache... because I truly believe this class is going to be incredible and potentially life changing, actually most likely it will change your life for the better.

Both Mondo Beyondo and Brene have absolutely changed mine. I took the first class of MB over a year ago and so many of my big fat scary dreams have come true with doing the dream work.

Brene's book "The Gifts of Imperfection" is a must read.

Listen to her Ted talk too, so good....

It starts tomorrow! Sign up for the class with me! Click on Dream Lab 2011!!!!

honoring your freakouts

print available here

I've been super slammed lately with projects. They all feel exciting and equally important. They have me working at least 12 hour days, from 10-10 usually. It feels alive. It feels overwhelming. It feels like I'm freaking out!

Today I realized that I have been pretending that I'm balanced! I naturally have a very calm and collected front (I've been told) and try to hold all of it together and minimize what's happening in my life. I recognized today that I don't have to do this. I can let on that I'm freaking out! I can honor this state of being! It's the most authentic thing to do.

It's like when I used to waitress I would never delegate my tasks of running for the ketchup, check or drinks to anyone else and continue to take tables and then low and behold I'd be in the weeds! I feel like I'm in the weeds right now. Working in the studio late on a Friday night.

I have this fantasy that this weekend I can bake all my friends meyer lemon pies... the one with a new baby, my pregnant friend, my inlaws, my friend who's turning 40... the list goes on. And of course the fantasy continues to spending quality time with all of them. I have this fantasy that I can be the good friend who listens to all my friends woes and never burden them with mine too. Isn't that silly? What kind of boring friend would that be?

I guess it comes down to valuing myself and my work. I find myself deferring to others when they talk about their big life issues-- babies, relationships, careers... even other artists work "Oh yeah, your show is a really big deal! It's so exciting!! Mine is just a little one. Oh you don't have to come". Enough. Enough of this self-deprecation and humility! I think it's time for me to own up and honor my own enoughness and freakout like the awesome freak that I am! I hope you give yourself permission to do the same!

Happy Freaky Friday the 13th xxxx
Mati

to beginnings!

i just went back into the archives of my blog-- so glad i never erased them-- and was cracking up and how candid and funny they were. i kind of miss that girl. i've gotten so, um, all biz on this blog. i did read this little gem that i thought i would share in regards to where i felt when i started 5 years ago and how i have come more into myself, but am still always growing art and life wise. aren't we? after teaching recently and then conversations with my interns... i thought this was pertinent to share. xooxox

it is weird being at the initial point of my transition as an artist. knowing that growth is inevitable, and to some extent i am in charge of how much. hoping not to dissapoint myself. not to judge too harshly. to put all of my body into it and have patience with my learning curve. to realize that my work will in some way be unique. trying to stay in the moment and not anticipate. wanting to grow more into myself, fully and strong.

dia de los muertos

One of my favorite days of the year is November 2nd and Dia De Los Muertos. I've been drawn to it in concept for as long as I can remember and have been celebrating it in some form since moving to the Mission District almost 10 years ago.

I love building an altar for those who have passed to remember them. I also love the artful celebration mixed with somberness mixed with playfulness in acknowledging death as a natural part of life. How often do we do that?

Growing up, having lost my dad as a baby, I wish that there had been a ritual in our culture that it was acceptable for us to gather to celebrate him. Every year as we grow older more folks pass on and I add them to my memory list. In 2003 Hugh and I went to Oaxaca, Mexico to celebrate Dia de Los Muertos in the decorated cemeteries and I remember it was the year of Johnny Cash, my Papa and family friend Michael B. This past year I thought a lot about my step-sister's mom and her humor and spirit of adventure. Here are some photos of us this year enjoying tacos, ice cream and feeling so alive playing dead.

peeking out and a count-down

2 days before i run my first 1/2 marathon!
4 days before i get on a plane for maine, for all of june!
3 days before my subletters move in and we have to all clean + packed!
10 days till my FIFTEENTH high school reuinon!
1 day left before i close my shop for the month!
1 month and 10 days till my next art show with lovely lisa at the curiosity shoppe!

ahhh... can't wait to rest and write and make art and dinner in maine... vacationlandia here we come!!! just got to do a few things to knock of the ol' to-do list first.

xoxoxo

ps- the blossom photo on my mirror was taken by my dear new friend and former painting student Diana. check out her new etsy shop goodness!

save the belugas + polar bears~ vote!

I don't intend for this blog to be my soapbox for my political views, but I happened to be doing image research on beluga whales for an illustration project and it coincided with reading this article in the New York Times this morning. Sarah Palin does not want to list Belugas on the endangered species list despite a 50% decline since the 1990's. Furthermore she doesn't want the listing to restrict coastal and offshore drilling~
As with the polar bear, Ms. Palin’s administration opposed the beluga listing in part because of its potential to restrict coastal and offshore oil and gas development. The beluga listing could also affect other projects, including the expansion of the Port of Anchorage and a proposed bridge over Knik Arm that would connect Anchorage to the Matanuska-Susitna Valley and Ms. Palin’s hometown, Wasilla.
Please Vote for Obama. If for no other reason than to curtail our environmental crisis. Imagine where a leader who supports decisions like these will take us.

embracing the ride

I was reading the SF Bike Coalition newsletter and started laughing at this interview of a family of bikers. Here is an excerpt from one of the kid bicyclists named Hannah, age 8:

Q: What was it like the first time you rode without training wheels and you didn't fall down?

Hannah: Well, at first I didn't want to take the training wheels off, but my dad took them off. He was going to give me a boost but I just took off and I had trouble getting around the corner.

John (Dad): You just took off, didn't you? I was just putting the wheels in the car and suddenly she was gone!

I was thinking about this in light of being a working artist and totally relating to challenge of getting around the corner. It's real. It's happening! My training wheels are off. NOW is the time and i'm going to embrace it. I'm going to really step into it/ step it up yet another level. It's not like I haven't been dreaming about this job title my entire life, but it's crept up on me and all of a sudden it really is my life. I'm no longer a student, no longer figuring out what I want to do with my life, but now the challenge is to balance it all. I feel like in the past I've talked about my art and small business casually, like it's a side gig. An interest. A hobby. When out with friends sometimes I still get shy and pretend it ain't no big thing. I paint some pictures. Sell some prints on line. Totally disregarding all the hard work I pour into it. The detail. The love. The headaches. The financial woes. The hustle. The self-imposed isolation. The saying no to parties and new dresses and fancy haircuts.

I was on the phone earlier with my mom totally stressed telling her how i was in the middle of packing up my etsy orders, wholesale orders, buying plane tickets to multiple art related events, answering a jillion emails and not getting to a million others and feeling anxious. All good things, but really feeling like this is hard. What happened? Why am i so busy? Where is the grounded me? The dreamer me? The passionately painting me?

My mom on the other end and coast in Maine was whipping up fresh gazpacho and carrying bags of blueberries up from the garden and trying to stay on top of the harvest. Sounds romantic, but I know a bit stressful when you have the pressure to make food out of all that has been harvested in the height of summer. Ahh, how i'd love to be there to reap the rewards of dinner this week.

Well in talking to her, i had the realization that i'm still here. All those parts are intact and all serve me at different times. I'm just gonna ride this wave of action right now. Part of the overwhelm comes in the resistance versus action. This is how it's gonna be. I'm a working artist, no one said this was easy.

In fact in college back in Minnesota a room full of art professors tried to dissuade the potential art majors from entering the creative field. "It is really hard", they remarked. They weren't lying, but I do wish they had been more encouraging.

So beneath all the flurry of activity, i'm still here.

Something shifted. An ounce of trust that it is all happening as it should and it is OK to acknowledge the worry, stress and overwhelm along with the fabulousness of being where I have dreamed to be... making art for my living, even if it's currently on a shoe string.

I am really so grateful for this opportunity. Thank you everyone who has supported my dreams and has bought art recently from me. I'll lend someone my training wheels if you'd like, or give you a push if yours are ready to come off too... they really have helped me for many rides!

Besos,
mati

ps- "Elephant Love" painting above is for the upcoming Enormous Tiny Show opening at Nahcotta Sept 5th!

facing fear is scary. yo!

i faced some deep seated personal fears yesterday and came through on the other side. i want to share some wisdom that got me through it.... ask for help, acknowledge how scared you are no matter how irrational it may seem (really listen to that scared part of yourself), write down your safety net... i wrote on a piece of paper all my loved ones (and i feel incredibly blessed that it was teeming over and names crammed into the sides) if the worst case scenario were to happen how they would catch me. and carry some mementos that help: sweet smelling jasmine i picked from a tree and a bright red leaf i found on my walk. nature helps ground me, in my pocket. i also brought my husband along for some hand holding. and i said a few prayers even though i'm not sure who i was praying to. it all helped. there's that saying.. "there's nothing to fear, but fear itself", but man that is real.

phew.

true blue friends are huge too. i have been so grateful of my growing & multi-dimensional friendship with the amazingly talented and real kelly. i feel she gets me and vice versa. we can talk low brow tv, indie flicks, painful bits and dreaming big all over a split pizza. thank you kelly. we are very excited to share news of a project we've been working towards that hopefully includes some of you too... soon!


some homemade photobooth pics of us from the other week. silly.

interesting that in order to celebrate fully it's also necessary to look straight at what's holding you back. for me at least. to embrace the vulnerabilities & the successes simultaneously feels weird, but entirely present.

tomorrow i'll share some shop news. till then. be kind to yourself. you are loved & safe.

sweet dreams,
mati